They called him Durec now. The name was much less important than who he had become.
Durc often sat on the hill overlooking Aurochs Camp to think, and to meditate after he became Kylie's acolyte. Today he had no particular purpose in squatting here idle. The Camp would be leaving for the Summer Meeting tomorrow. Nearly everything was packed already, but the women were fussing over details so much that it was safest for the men to get out of their way. Tarneg had gone fishing--a fine example for a headman to set, Deegie had said, with laughter in her voice. Her mate, Branag, had taken their children on pretty much the same sort of outing.
Laughter, that wonderful release that the Clan would never know... Durc rubbed his face with one hand, feeling the robust bone structure that marked him as different from the Mamutoi, his adopted people. His Clan features were nowhere near as pronounced as those of his former friends and hunting companions. Ura had been like him that way.
Mixed spirits, his Mamutoi friends said. Ura's mother's totem must have been overcome by that of one of the Others who had accosted her. He wondered if they were Mamutoi, or perhaps Sungaea, or even far-ranging Ramudoi. The people whom he had once thought of as Others, some of whom were his clan now, were protected by powerful spirits. He knew this well--it was his life work now to speak with these spirits.
It mattered little in Ura's case what spirits had caused her to be born to her bereaved mother. His sweet, loving mate had died in childbirth after a difficult winter pregnancy. He missed her yet; the pain was still there although time had softened it.
Time had not brought him a new mate. The fact was, he had not sought one. He had thrown himself into learning the ways of the Mamutoi, and the ways of their Great Mother and Her many lesser spirits. His Wolf totem seemed quite at home with them. He had to smile at the memory of his mixed welcome by Chac, the wolf companion of Frebec. The wolf had been wary of him until Frebec introduced them to one another, but then became a steadfast friend. Durc looked forward to seeing both of them soon.
He stretched out on the lush grass, letting himself revel in unaccustomed idleness. The green foliage bent softly beneath his bare back. The weather had been good here; Mut smiled upon Her children in these lands. Grazing was good, the herds were fat. Farther eastward, it was said, things were not so good. The rains had not come for two seasons. Runners brought news that the Mammoth Hunters of that region had given up and were migrating this way. Several Camps of the drought-starved easterners would be at this year's Summer Meeting. Well, there was enough for everyone here, a few more people wouldn't eat up all the animals.
Small clouds drifted over in a sky of magical blue. One of them, directly overhead, looked like an otter. It made him think of a medicine woman's bag. Both his real mother, the mysterious Ayla who was almost a legend among the Mamutoi, and Uba, her Clan sister, were medicine women.
Ayla had become a medicine woman through hard study, Uba had told him. The golden-haired woman had no Memories, yet she had become highly skilled, accepted by the Clan as if she were truly born of the renowned line that only Uba now represented.
Durc's own Memories were a patchy affair. He had found that sometimes he could make up for their inadequacy in ways that disturbed his clan. Durc learned to do things that were not in normal men's Memories, things that men had no reason to bother with. The bits and pieces of women's knowledge that he picked up from observing them when he was very young had stood him in good stead when he left the Clan. He chuckled to himself at the thought of his terrible cooking (which had improved with practice) and the smelly hides that he had used for shelter on the long, solitary journey that had ended here, at the place he now called home.
Home...yes, he was at home with the Mamutoi. Thanks to the wonderful support of his Aurochs Camp family--they were all his family, the whole Camp--he had become one of them, accepted by all of the Mammoth Hunters. There were still a few who looked askance at him, but with Kylie backing him he had overcome most of the initial hostility of some. The woman Mamut had strong ties with many men and women of high status. After years of training, he was a full Mamut himself.
The language had been a mighty hurdle to surmount at first, but he had gone at it with the same sober intensity that had seen him through other difficulties. It had given him a great deal of insight regarding the differences between Clan and Others, especially the Memories or lack of them. He understood himself better now.
Memories...there were the Clan Memories that he had been born with, like deep caves in his mind inhabited by living images that never changed. That was how they seemed to him; he could not say how it was for one of full Clan spirit. Perhaps it was more like coming out of a cave into another world, like the visions that he had, first under Kylie's guidance and then on his own.
The other kind of memory was a shifting assembly of relationships that grew and grew as his daily life and dreams left traces. There were areas where it was hard to tell where one kind of memory left off and the other began. The deepest Clan Memories were distinct as a core of flint when he got down to them. His own memories were clear too, but the way his thoughts moved from one to another was different.
Ah, well. Durc yawned lazily. "You are too serious, Durec, you work too hard," Kylie was always telling him. She made him take time to slow down and relax, turning idleness into duty. He knew she was right; he did tend to go at everything too long and too hard. It was better to take a break now and then to let his thoughts settle in. Uba had often chided him gently, saying, "Durc, you should not work like a woman, you are almost a man now. Go and hunt, my good son, bring me back a nice rabbit for dinner."
Not that Clan men did not work, but what they did was different--short bursts of intense activity followed by leisure, while the women's chores were steady, evenly paced.
He yawned again and closed his eyes, content with good memories.
He woke abruptly, alerted by the sound of a voice.
"Hola! Durec! Heyoooo! Where are you?"
It was Branag. Durc sat up and rubbed his eyes. The sun had moved some distance while he napped. "Ho, I'm right here," he called.
"Time to eat," Branag shouted back. Durc saw him at the base of the hill, waving and grinning.
"I'm coming." He stretched a bit and got up. Branag was heading back toward the lodge. Everyone else was sitting or standing around, undoubtedly waiting for dinner to be served. Durc could smell broiled trout.
The Aurochs Camp sat down to an excellent meal. There were only a few large fish, but they had plenty of other small game plus a fine pot of boiled greens.
Conversation drifted naturally toward the Summer Meeting. Everyone looked forward to seeing old friends and making new ones, and there would be the usual competition for status--who had the most beads, the best leather and furs, the biggest piece of amber, the slickest tongue to persuade others. Trading would be fierce, and everyone would swear they got the best deal.
Durc spoke little, listening to the others while his thoughts wandered. Something that someone said about the easterners made him suddenly stop chewing as an unbidden memory leapt into his mind. He had dreamed while he lay on the hilltop, and it came back to him now in a clear vision.
"Is something wrong, Durec?"
Kylie's question brought him back to the present. He picked a bone from between his teeth and swallowed the fish. "No...I was remembering a dream. You know how they come back when you never expect..." He flicked the bone neatly into the fire. Kylie was eyeing him expectantly.
"I dreamed about the Summer Meeting. There were people with their faces painted black, weeping." Some of the others paused in their talk to listen. They looked concerned at the dismal scene he described. He hastened to continue, "They were not mourning for anyone that we know. They were all strange to me, I think they must have been the people from the east."
His listeners nodded, relieved. Durc went on, "The people with the black faces were all together on one side of the camp. I stood there looking at them. Then the spirit of my totem, the Grey Wolf, appeared from under the cape I wore. He walked away from me and went among the black-faced people. They paid no attention to him.
"Soon the Wolf came back out of the crowd. A woman followed him. I looked into her eyes..." Durc trailed off, half lost in the returned vision. "That is all I remember," he finished.
Kylie smiled. "I think your totem has a surprise in store for you."
"Mpf. Maybe." Durc shrugged, smiled, and set to finishing his dinner.